I think you’re awesome and all, and I’m really glad you’re here. I just wanted to share a few things with you, since you’re still new to the fold…
1. In case you were wondering, mom’s foot is not a launchpad.
2. I am not a backup singer. I know you had no way of knowing that. Just wanted you to be aware that I prefer to be lead vocal next time we have karaoke night.
3. Cleaning up after parties is a must.
4. While mom is fine sharing her pashmina with you, she’d prefer that you not help yourself to all the pillowcases in the linen closet, too. We have a nice quilt in there already, in case you forgot.
5. Barring thunderstorms, only one of us can fit in the kitty cup.
6. But I like it when we share the leopard throw.
7. Now that we’ve covered parties and launchpads and sleeping arrangements, mom and I wanted you to know we think your crunchy art is really stellar. We’d even like to share some of your pieces this week, because we’re both super proud.
8. I made this one. You can tell, because of all the hair in the bowl.
9. We think your pate art also has promise, so we’re showcasing it here.
10. Here’s one I made this week, in case you want to study my technique.
11. Your photobombing has gotten much better. Mom, on the other hand, needs to be more careful.
Well, I don’t know about you, but all this mentoring has worn me out. I think it’s time for a nap.
Don’t worry little C. You got this.